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Other Types of Wedding Ceremonies!

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by Joni Moss-Grahm
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Second Weddings

  • This is your chance to do it all over again, exactly the way you want to. Planning the wedding this time around just may be more fun -- there's bound to be less pressure from parents or other well-meaning opinon-meisters. Since second-timers often foot the bill themselves, they have more freedom to call the shots. And, having done it before, they know exactly what shots to call. A second Wedding can be a huge soiree with all the trimmings or an intimate, family only affair. Brides, you can walk down the aisle with your parents again (or anyone else you choose) or go it alone. You both can wear anything you want -- white, off-white, red-velvet jumpsuit. (But brides, you might want to skip the veil this time -- you're going into it with your eyes open, and the veil is a first-time bride tradition, anyway.) Basically, a second wedding is just like a first wedding, except one (or both of you) has a bit more experience. And you'll probably feel less tied to tradition.
  • Other types of Wedding Ceremonies
  • If you have kids include them in the ceremony. Even if they're thrilled about the ceremony and your wedding (cake, presents, party!), they'll probably need reassurance about their continued importance in your life (particularly if they live with you). Your new status gives them new status too -- and it wasn't of their choosing. Don't expect them to do more at your wedding than they usually can -- if your five-year-old refuses to stand still for ten minutes on an ordinary Saturday afternoon, he won't suddenly do it at your wedding. And if your kids don't want to participate, try to respect their feelings.
  • If you're still friendly with your ex-spouse and your ex-family-in-law, go ahead and invite them, if you want to. If you're ex is the Father of your children, including him shows your kids that they don't have to “take sides”; your new spouse doesn't mean they get a replacement parent. But consider the feelings of your partner, too. If he or she will be uncomfortable with your ex at the wedding, you might want to withhold that invite.
  • Be considerate of each other during the planning process, and respect the fact that your differing experiences may lead to different desires and expectations. If this is your second wedding but your fiancés first, don't make too many comments like “Last time we used this caterer,” or “I know because I've done it before.” You want the first-time to know that this is the most important wedding in the history of the universe.
  • If you're the first-time partner, don't dwell on your to-be's past. Focus on your Wedding don't ask about the first Wedding or dig out old photo albums from your basement. If s/he keeps bringing up last time, keep explaining that this is new to you and that you want to start from scratch.


Commitment Ceremonies

  • There are now currently many states that allows same sex couples to marry in the form of a civil union. Check out each state's website for further details to see which states do allow this.
  • Civil union can be performed by Judges, Justice of the Peace, and Clergy. Having a commitment ceremony or Holy Union serves the same purpose as a traditional wedding.
  • A man and woman can also do a Commitment Ceremony. There may be reasons why they cannot do a legal ceremony. One of which is perhaps that they have a past monthly income that could change once they remarry.
  • Makes a public proclamation of your love and intent to remain together.
  • Brings your family and friends together to support your union.
  • Gives you a sense of permanence, stability, and security.
  • Helps you secure domestic partner status (in some states).
  • A wedding ceremony can have added significance for a gay or lesbian couple -- since you're not always getting a legal document, the ceremony itself is the binding ritual (as it should be). A wedding ceremony -- gay or straight -- is about the two of you and your commitment to a belief in each other.

Vow Renewals

In this world where divorce seems to be the norm, a couple managing to stay together through thick and thin deserves some celebration.If you and your spouse have made it to a significant anniversary, or you just want to have a “do-over” Wedding, consider a Vow Renewal.

  • Reasons you might want a Vow Renewal
  • You want to celebrate your 5-year, 10-year, 25-year, etc. Wedding Anniversary
  • You only got married legally before, and now want to marry religiously
  • You only got married religiously before, and now want to marry legally
  • Your first Wedding had some element of disaster, and you want a do-over
  • You didn't have much money for your first Wedding, and you want a more elaborate Wedding
  • You got married with only a few people present, and you'd like to say Wedding vows in front of lots of family and friends
  • You've had some rocky times in your relationship, and would now like to reaffirm your commitment to one another
  • You think it would be romantic

How to renew your Wedding Vows

The good news is, there are far less rules and dos and don'ts about vow renewal than almost any other kind of ritual. It can be as simple as the two of you alone in a beautiful spot reciting vows you have written, or a fancy affair with hundreds of guests.

First step

Just as with any wedding planning, you should begin by figuring out what style of ceremony/reception you'd like, deciding a budget, picking a date and finding a venue. Some couples who are older will have much more money than when they wed the first time; others, whose parents helped the first time, may have far less. The good news is that Vow Renewals are generally cheaper than first weddings, and with less rules on what “should” be done, you can really concentrate on the elements that are important to you. You can certainly show off your personalities and have fun with it!

Please feel free to contact me if I can assist you with your Vegas Wedding plan!!!!

Joni Moss
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